that means on august 5th, 8:00pm est (12 am ust) i will be closing the submissions form
at this point submissions have slowed down with very many good submissions but very few repeats, so i will have to count on description and bias. (*´∀｀*) vouch for your characters because honestly if they have more than 1 they’re in automatically (don’t spam though, of course ==)
feel free to ask any questions!
Y’all, I input “Bojji,” “Bil & Ted,” and “orange tabby from real life.” Back me up here.
This is the first thing I saw coming out of anesthesia. What a Good Day.
[id: the Scrooge meme edited so that thebibliosphere is scrooge and cryptotheism is the little bunny outside his window. thebibliosphere says, “You there, boy! What day is it?” And cryptotheism replies “Why, it’s Trump indicted for January 6th Day, sir!” the bibliosphere exclaims, “Then I haven’t missed it!” end id]
It could be the fentanyl but this is the fucking funniest thing I’ve ever seen.
weirdly specific and unrelated asks to know someone well:
chipotle order?
thoughts on veganism?
a specific color that gives you the ick?
mythical creature you think/believe is real?
favorite form of potato?
do you use a watch?
what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium?
do you change into specific clothes for the house when you get home?
do you have a skincare routine (and how many steps is it)?
on a plane, do you ask for apple or orange juice?
anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?
brand of haircare/bodycare/skincare that you trust 100%?
first thing you’re doing in the purge?
do you think you’re dehydrated?
rank the methods of death: freezing, burning, drowning
thoughts on mint chocolate chip?
an anxious compulsion you do everyday?
your boba/tea order?
the veggie you dislike the most?
favorite disney princess movie?
a number that weirds you out?
do you have an emotional support water bottle?
do you wear jewelry?
which do you find yourself using, american or british english?
would you say you have good taste in music?
how’s your spice tolerance?
what’s your favorite or go-to outfit?
last meal on earth?
preferred pasta noodle?
ask me anything !
leave an ask for the person you reblog it from!
no need for asks i am answering them all
chipotle order? I have never eaten at a Chipotle.
thoughts on veganism? I deeply sympathise with the ethics behind it, but the vegans who say that honey is not vegan are obviously unaware that in order to pollinate vegan crops, one must have bees, and that for the hive to remain healthy one should regularly remove the excess honeycomb, which is, I should presume, good for the welfare of these bees. That’s my specific gripe. If you’re a vegan who just doesn’t like honey, then I have no gripes.
a specific color that gives you the ick? Chartreuse. Vivid yellow-greens are bountiful in nature yet when pasted on a wall or on clothing, I am reminded more of my childhood throw-up. Chartreuse + Orange combo provokes fight or flight.
mythical creature you think/believe is real? Mi wile pilin.
favorite form of potato? Smack barm pey wet. Just kidding ; mashed.
do you use a watch? When I leave the house, yes.
what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium? horseshoe crabs that I can touch
do you change into specific clothes for the house when you get home? Only if I already changed into separate clothes for an outing.
do you have a skincare routine (and how many steps is it)? NO.
on a plane, do you ask for apple or orange juice? Apple.
anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?=nervous laughter= Many things.
brand of haircare/bodycare/skincare that you trust 100%? Soap.
first thing you’re doing in the purge? Protecting my snails.
do you think you’re dehydrated? Having just drunk a glass of water, no.
rank the methods of death: freezing, burning, drowning. Freezing, drowning, burning.
thoughts on mint chocolate chip? It’s fine.
an anxious compulsion you do everyday? I have OCD so this isn’t a great question for specifics.
your boba/tea order? cà phê sữa đá with a trà lài chaser if possible. Otherwise, a lightly spiced black tea with milk and sugar. Always amenable to a quality green tea!
the veggie you dislike the most? White cabbage. Red cabbage is delicious, hearty, and full of anthocyanin magic. White cabbage is most often served in slaw form, which disgusts me.
favorite disney princess movie? Mulan or Sleeping Beauty.
a number that weirds you out? 6, due to Catholic Nun School Upbringing reasons. However, I’ve taken 16 as a lucky number to compensate.
do you have an emotional support water bottle? No.
do you wear jewelry? Quite often, snom pins. Occasionally, rings.
which do you find yourself using, american or british english? Spoken American, but British spelling. get me drunk and I’ll first lapse into a Trans-Atlantic (old hollywood) accent, and then into the French language or Japanese language.
would you say you have good taste in music? No. I am not so presumptuous.
how’s your spice tolerance? Mmmm, spicy :)
what’s your favorite or go-to outfit? Business suit.
last meal on earth? It depends on whether I’m dying, or if the Earth itself is about to go out. If I’m dying, I release my snails to a copse full of their favourite bushes and then have black bean chicken Hunan with carrot, bell-pepper, broccoli, bamboo, water chestnuts, and lily-bulb. If the entire Earth is about to be extinguished, I’ll share a head of lettuce with my snails so we’ll go out together. They’ll get the green leafy part that they like best and I’ll get the white crunchy part that I like best but they dislike. I’m getting sad thinking about this.
preferred pasta noodle? Ramen, legitimately. The thin and crinkly texture is perfect for both broths and for thick sauces.
I have been a sheep caretaker for like two days and already I’m like. Wow. I get it.
I get why these were some of the earliest mammals to ever be domesticated. They look up to humans with this sort of dumb but all at once innocent and pure and trusting expression. They’re happy to see you. They follow you around. They like to be rubbed under their chins. Maybe its just some latent Scottish highland shepherd DNA I still have in me but I look at my sheep charges and suddenly I see why the love of God for humanity is so often described as a shepherd and his sheep. I’d fight a wolf for these guys. I’d go way the Hell out of my way for them. I’d carry their young for miles on my own back.
pov: you’re starscream and your leader has been out in deep space for three years with no word and he finally returns and you ask him where the decepticon army is that he’s. y’know. been looking for for three years. and he just goes “oh you’re gonna love this. i found something even better.” and he pulls out this space crack that’s made out of the blood of space satan and says that he’s gonna use it to revive a zombie army. and then he’s like “we gotta test this shit soooo. you wanna volunteer your corpse.” and you just laugh nervously and thank primus that you happened to shank an autobot earlier that afternoon.
like i’d also keep trying to overthrow him at every opportunity
Okay so Victorian erotica is literally the most heinous, morally bankrupt, horrific shit I’ve ever read - but I’ve read a fair bit, partly from historical interest but also because a while back I helped a friend with a university project she was doing about censorship and pornography in 19th century England.
Anyway I need to share with you all the most hilarious line that has ever been written, circa 1887:
I feel like this excerpt is significantly enhanced by knowing that the novel in question is a first-person narrative written from the perspective of an inexplicably sapient flea who lives on Bella’s body, and that’s why the third priest’s penis is described in this way: from the narrator’s perspective it literally blots out the sky.
Anonymous
